Impatient Patients

I can't believe the incredible thick bureaucracy of the medical system! My husband and I just spent six and a half hours in the hospital trying to get two different kinds of scans done. My husband has been dealing with brain cancer for two and a half years now, with a recent recurrence this summer. So while waiting two hours for his second scan of the day, a CT scan, we also find out that a particular conversation between two of our doctors, regarding an important transfer of information, has never transpired. We've been waiting for three weeks for information to pass between these two. How FRUSTRATING! My husband's treatment is waiting on all these people to get COORDINATED! Meanwhile the cancer cells grow... Really, what kind of person do you have to be to get efficient medical treatment in this country? A Senator?

Here's hubby's blog: http://brain.fraczard.com/

So how can I continue to be an artist during all this? Jon says that knowing I'm following my path is what keeps some sense of sanity in our lives. I keep grasping for threads of integrity. How can I spend so much of my time in a field that seems so narcissistic and ego-centered? By telling myself that I'm investigating embodiment - how can we live in our diseased bodies in this toxic environment with any hope of Grace. I'm looking for Grace.

Which brings me to Flow theory and my project incorporating Flow into the choreographic process. It's an odd task I've set for myself and my dancers... finding this expansive state of mind and body during a creative process. What I'm finding is that the Flow state is really more accessible at the beginning of the process – in the improvisational stages – and in performance. The middle is full of nuts and bolts dance crafting. But we keep our Flow lens on, attending to the 'how' of the making and hope that it will all make sense in the end.